How We Learn to Be Brave: Decisive Moments in Life and Faith

Content Warning: This section of the guide includes discussion of death, racism, and antigay bias.

Budde was born Mariann Edgar in 1959 in New Jersey to her Swedish American mother, Ann Bjorkman, and her American father, William Edgar. Budde remained in New Jersey for much of her childhood before moving to Colorado with her father, an experience that she documents in Chapter 1, “Deciding to Go.” Her father’s second marriage ended, and Budde heard the call to return to her mother and New Jersey, which also allowed her to return to the Episcopal Church, a crucial step in her faith journey. After graduating high school in New Jersey, Budde attended the University of Rochester, where she earned her Bachelor of Arts in history. She earned her Master of Divinity and her Doctor of Ministry degrees from Virginia Theological Seminary in 1989 and 2008, respectively. She became an Episcopal deacon in 1988 before becoming a priest in 1989. In 1986, she married Paul Budde, with whom she has two sons.

Budde served as assistant rector at a church in Toledo, Ohio, after finishing her Master of Divinity degree. She went on to be rector of a church in Minneapolis, Minnesota, a position that she held for 18 years until she was elected the ninth bishop of Washington, DC, in 2011. As bishop, Budde values advocacy and initiative. In 2017, she oversaw the removal of stained-glass windows celebrating Confederate leaders and their subsequent replacement with stained glass windows celebrating the civil rights movement. In 2018, alongside Gene Robinson, the first gay Episcopal bishop, Budde helped lay to rest the remains of Matthew Shepard, a gay man who was murdered in a heinous hate crime 20 years prior. As she describes in the opening introduction of How We Learn to Be Brave, in 2020, Budde stood up to Donald Trump’s use of St. John’s Church as a photo-op and political tool to spread a message that she felt was inconsistent with Jesus’ teachings, a message condemning the Black Lives Matter movement’s peaceful protests following the murder of George Floyd.

However, this would not be Budde’s last moment of conflict with Trump. More recently, in 2025, Budde made headlines again. In her homily during Trump’s second inaugural interfaith service, Budde delivered a powerful message imploring Trump to show mercy, a concept frequently espoused by Jesus throughout the Bible. Budde said,

I ask you to have mercy, Mr. President, on those in our communities whose children fear that their parents will be taken away. And that you help those who are fleeing war zones and persecution in their own lands to find compassion and welcome here. Our God teaches us that we are to be merciful to the stranger, for we were all once strangers in this land. May God grant us the strength and courage to honor the dignity of every human being, to speak the truth to one another in love and walk humbly with each other and our God for the good of all people (Ray, Siladitya. “What Did the Bishop Say to Trump During the Inaugural Prayer Service? Here’s the Full Transcript.” Forbes, 22 Jan. 2025).

In her homily, Budde appealed to key Christian concepts that she examines throughout How We Learn to Be Brave. She called upon her audience, Trump, and others to find the courage to practice mercy. She also used collective language by referring to God as “our God” and asking her audience to “walk humbly with each other and our God” in faith and in mercy, all of which is consistent with her teachings in her writings and in her preaching. Budde has continued her advocacy for the marginalized, spreading the message of her faith in a courageous manner, both publicly and privately.